Deep Frustration.

I mentioned during the Carkeek race report that my hip was bugging me. Well it turned in to a full-blown hip injury and as I write I haven’t run in almost three weeks. For a while I gutted through. But eventually the pain was just searing down the outside of my femur, deeper than the IT band, and it kept getting worse. I went to the same PT as Melissa. We don’t have a diagnosis. Could be any number of things. Stress fracture. Labrum inflammation. So I’ve been doing exercises, not running, walking less, taking ibuprofen, and hoping.

It’s definitely getting better. I was able to do three slow one-minute jogs on the assault treadmill without pain. I’ve done some long bike rides with mixed results. Definitely increases soreness, but then it would; I haven’t been doing long bike rides since last September. But a few things are promising. I can do the stair machine for a good half hour at a time. I’ve been hitting the gym more and doing strength. And I’ve been swimming.

But I lost a trail half-marathon this past weekend. And there’s no way I’ll be ready for the Beat the Blerch marathon next month. And frankly, with only ten weeks until the ultra, I don’t think I can do it. I’m not going too be healthy or fit in time. My body takes a very long time to heal. I’m hoping to get to jog this weekend. But I don’t know. But I do know that even if I can start again now, getting out to 31 miles by the end of October is a tall order.

I’m disappointed and frustrated. My knee started hurting two and a half years ago and it still does. But I could run through that pain. This hip pain I can’t. And if it takes me years to heal? I may have to give up running entirely. I’m very afraid, and feeling lost about it. And I don’t know how to fix that.